MASS-DEBATE AFTERMATH

September 27, 2008

Who won? Whatever the wingnuts might say, Obama lost less.

"McCain seemed growly and tense, though more focused than usual. Because McCain didn't beat Obama, and because Obama is ahead right now, Obama wins a narrow victory."
Rod Dreher, Beliefnet.com

So the long-awaited rumble (the Thriller in Vanilla?) arrived and passed. And it's difficult to imagine either side feeling particularly boned-up by their candidate's performance. Obama came off like a hostage negotiator attempting to find common ground with an unmedicated McA-hole who played it with all his trademarked truculence. And aside from calling his angriness out on some of his lie catalog, Obama landed very few punches and looked like a pussy for much of the time. Not such a good thing if you wonder that most people would rather have an asshole as prez than a pussy if the choice was limited to either of the above.

By the various benchmarks used to assess this miserable event, it was still a points win for Obama. Even according to the Fox News focus group. The CNN poll asked who was more intelligent (Obama +15); who was clearer on the issues (Obama +17); most sincere (Obama +8); showed stronger leadership (Obama +6); more likeable (Obama +35) and more in touch (Obama +30). The only win for McCain was "Who spent more time attacking his opponent?" An easy victory at McCain 60%, Obama 23%.

It's inevitable that the Orwellian spinmeisters at McCain HQ will lie so much that their version of reality - a McCain win - will become currency in a few days. Hell, they even put up ads trumpeting their guy as winner hours ahead of the event... but, for now, let's just try and remember the truth: Obama won. A bit.

Nothing much for the memory banks last night aside from McCain's contemptuous bitch-queen demeanor, the fact that he never looked Obama in the eye and the historical importance of his admission that America has used torture as a tool under the Bush junta. Then there was the issue of McCain, already widely haemorrhaging voter confidence over concerns about his spastic temper, twice muttering 'horseshit' during a televised presidential debate because he didn't like what Obama was saying. Way to lay the temper issue to rest there, McHissyfit. (Link to this)

VIVE ROBESPIERRE!

September 21, 2008

Memo to McPalin supporters: America was born of revolution. Not pussyish acquiescence to economic rape.

Freemarket fundamentalists and fluffers of the filthy rich (see McPalin, Phil Gramm, etc.) must surely be descended from those aristos who inspired the invention of the guillotine. A shame so few of those fancy head choppers are currently rolling off our production lines. Or more accurately, being imported from China.

McCain seems to think that whipping off his tie and regurgitating a few populist clichés at an auto plant is enough to throw us off the scent. But it's hard to look like a man of the people when your wife sports $313,100 outfits, owns 10 houses and has $100 million in the bank. John McCain? Classless society? At least in one sense.

The neo-aristos and their GOP lackies jibber about 'liberals' and 'class warfare' and fire off slurs in the direction of Obama (see Hannity's televised analingus on Sarah Palin). But beneath the lies and obfuscation, they do know what they're talking about: There is class war in America and it's been raging since before the ink on the Declaration of Independence was dry... and those chinless neo-aristos of corporate America are winning it with embarrassing ease.

Our current economic thrill ride into oblivion only serves as a reminder that the few guys who own everything have somehow mind-melded us into internalizing their self-interest and persuaded us to forget about our own. Even in the midst of financial apocalypse, we don't seem to care much about our own money (even as we're picking up the tab for all those collapsing mega-corporations). But we still respond enthusiastically to Pavlovian calls to protect the fortunes of the rich. Tax cuts for the middle classes? Hell no. Tax cuts for the rich? Of course.

Instead of crying tears of betrayal over our bank statements and demanding solutions from those in power, we just focus on the latest campaign slurs and maybe crack one off to a Sarah Palin speech on TV... then march out to vote to ensure more corporate welfare breaks and fatter payoffs. Really? We're that stupid? We are not so much losing the class war as bending over in the direction of the enemy to be machine-gunned repeatedly in the ass.

Epilogue...
One day, as they forage through the rubble in an attempt to understand our failed civilization, it will become a source of mystery to the bands of post-meltdown nomads how so few managed to enslave so many with nothing more than really stupid talking points. "So... they voted for their own annihilation after being swayed by the arrival of a bespectacled Toast Masters alumni from Alaska? What kind of people were they?!" What could we say? "Ah, but she looked do-able(ish)."

But there may be a scientific explanation for McPailn's counterintuitive popularity and why we seem so determined to vote against our own interests:

"Now research suggests that different reactions – and perhaps all political beliefs – might have a basis in biology.

"Traditionally, political scientists have focused on the environmental aspects: school, the media, the family, the church, as the things that lead to beliefs they have," says Douglas Oxley, a political scientist at the University of Nebraska, in Lincoln. However, his team discovered that social conservatives react more strongly to shocking images and sudden noises by sweating more and blinking harder, compared to liberals.

Such innate threat responses point to a biological, and perhaps genetic, basis for our politics, he says."

Shocking images and sudden noises? Bring on the guillotines and vive Robespierre! (Link to this)

McREALITY CHECK

September 18, 2008

"The fundamentals of our economy are strong"
John McCain, September 14, 2008

Has the Palin fantasy worn off in the face of grim reality? Has the herd been spooked? Can we get back to having a grown-ups' election?

Maybe there is hope. Maybe people are starting to realize that having a zero-experience, religious maniac and pathological liar one 73-year-old heart beat away from the presidency is not such a good idea when reality is biting so hard. Could it be true? Could the shit-shoveling middle-classes really be interested in voting for their own interests again instead of mindlessly internalizing the concerns of the platinum-league plutocrats? So say those polls...

"Since Sept. 13, Palin's unfavorables have climbed from 30 percent to 36 percent. Meanwhile, her favorables have slipped from 52 percent to 48 percent. That's a three-day net swing of -10 points, and it leaves her tied for the smallest favorability split (+12) of any of the Final Four. Over the course of a single weekend, in other words, Palin went from being the most popular White House hopeful to the least."

Wingnuts have made so many allowances for Palin. But maybe even they are starting to choke on the moose shit. She has lied consistently on issues large and small, relevant and irrelevant, both helpful and damaging to her own cause, as if she has not so much a character deficiency as a full-blown disease. Here are a few basic lies from the Palin list:

Lied about her record on global warming
Lied about ad libbing her acceptance speech
Lied about visiting Iraq and (for some reason) Ireland
Lied about audience sizes
Lied about 'Troopergate'
Lied about her support of Ted Stevens' bridge to nowhere
Lied about a non-existent Alaskan gas pipeline
Lied about increasing funding for special needs kids

So much for Palin. How about the man who used to be running for the top job before VP suddenly became more important? McA-hole has, of course, lied his wrinkled ass off about many things. But, in terms of great lies with the inherent potential to derail a candidacy, let's thank political providence for the McA-hole campaign's recent assertion that he "invented the Blackberry." This is the kind of crap that can be stretched miles out of context and cause the most damage (see: Gore) because we don't really care about him lying to our faces about being Bush III, the economy, the war in Iraq or any of the other whoppers he's let slip recently. But when a lie makes you look stupid as well as just plain dishonest? That's a whole new ball of wax.

The McPalin thing has been a wild ride... is it finally coming to a shuddering, ignominious anticlimax? (Link to this)

HOLD STRONG, PROUD OBAMANAUTS!

September 13, 2008

"The braying sheep on the TV screen
Make this boy shout, make this boy scream
Going underground..."
(Geezer reference: The Jam, Going Underground)

And so it comes to pass... even after what might have been the Democrats' finest hour since the 60s, is it all spiraling down the toilet of history yet again?

There's an involuntary nervous twitch on the Dems' poker face... There's chatter about the possibility of them losing what looked unloseable only a month ago. Why? Because once again the GOP has changed the election process from a straightforward evaluation of contrasting policies (that they could never hope to win) into yet another circle-jerk 'who's got the biggest flag?' competition. As usual, they're trying to spare us the leg work of making adult decisions and are giving us another brusque push into idiocracy.

But for the Obamanauts to lose their nerve at this point and fold like they had a running flush of John Kerrys, would be an unforgivable gyp. We need them to win. Even those of us who are too f***ing stupid to appreciate the gravity of the post-Bush disaster we're experiencing need them to win. So come out fighting and don't bail on us, Obamanauts!

Remember: John McCain is not running against Barack Obama. John McCain is running against reason. And if we were a little more interested in substance and a bit more concerned about the abuse of truth in the public forum, McCain could not be running against anybody. Period. He'd be at home in Arizona poring over his campaign scrapbook, wallowing in bathos and blathering about how he could have been a contender.

Sure, it might look bad. But in spite of the prerogative of the partisan hacks to talk up their side of the 'debate', dress it up like reality and palm it off on the human cattle who fear liberalism more than they resent the pounding they've had under Bush, there really is no debate. It's just more noise that should signify greater desperation amongst the GOP than it should be sparking amongst the Dems.

With the scales lifted from their eyes, anyone can see this campaign has been subverted by Rovian 'distractionism' and might as well be conducted in Hungarian for all the relevance it has to the voter. And that, my friends, sucks ass and should be called out loudly and unhesitatingly.

We as citizens of [what we keep trying to convince ourselves is] the world's greatest democracy, are obligated by common sense to cut through the bullshit, the kindergarten insults and the lies. There comes a time when this is not so much important as imperative... and that time is now. Are we going to let the deciding weeks of this election fade out in a flurry of inconsequence while the issues die quietly in a forgotten corner of the public consciousness? Or are we going to stand up and expect to be treated as voters not as the judging panel of some z-grade reality show?

Even among those who resent Obama, could there really be anyone able to put hand on heart and deny he has conducted his campaign with maturity, honesty and integrity? And could those same people say that about McCain without blinking wildly and breaking into nervous laughter?

We as voters are faced with simple choices: Elect the guy who is pursuing the highest office in the land with all due gravitas and deference to public duty. Or elect the tired fraud trying to browbeat us into buying another dose of Bushism like a slick car dealer unloading a lemon. Do we choose the candidate with honor? Do we choose the candidate without? It really is that simple... so it's hard to see why the Dems should be peeing their tighty whities.

Please forgive a mixed-event sporting metaphor, but while the stakes might be huge, the game is still an easy shot at an open basket... if only the voters of reason can ignore the heckling from the sidelines and the on-court smack talk. (Link to this)

ELECTION UPDATE: WE'RE FUCKED

September 9, 2008

So where are we with that election thing again? Let's see... still got John McCain and Sarah Palin - the Clyde to his Clint Eastwood - running. And we're fucked.

Nuns & Ammo or "Let's go bag us some lib'ral polar bears!"

We've got the wrapped-in-the-flag mob braying for a guy whose campaign slogan sounds like it's ripped straight out of Mein Kampf. What else does "Country First" mean apart from the subordination of the individual to the state (a.k.a. National Socialism)?

Then we have the old guy's daughter pissing on everyone who has ever served their country by saying "no-one knows what war is like other than my family. Period." So I guess Palin isn't the only one with a retard kid then?

Then we've got the same mob deifying his laughably unsuitable veep choice and ignoring her hubby's dedication to undermine the United States itself via the secessionist Alaskan Independence Party.

"I'm not an American. I've got no use for America or her damned institutions."

Who could that be? Louis Farrakhan? Jeremiah Wright in peeved mode? Nope. It's Alaska Independence Party founder Joe Vogler at the party's convention in 2008. That's the same year Sarah Palin provided a video-taped welcome address to the 2008 convention. Palin was "delighted" and asked that they "keep up the good work". Here's more of Vogler's good work:

"The fires of hell are frozen glaciers compared to my hatred for the American government. And I won't be buried under their damn flag. I'll be buried in Dawson. And when Alaska is an independent nation they can bring my bones home."

Doesn't something about this make McCain/Palin's whole "Country First" fortune cookie motto ring a tad hollow? Even if, as the Stepford GOPers are so eager to remind us, Saint Sarah was never a card-carrying member of the AIP herself - it was only hubby - this is the kind of crap that would stick solidly if thrown Obama's way. Can you imagine them cutting him the kind of slack they cut Palin? How would "Actually, I was never a member of the Oakland chapter of the Black Panthers. That was Michelle..." work in that scenario?

It's just a thought, but perhaps the McNews media commentators should be talking about the critical issues surrounding Palin/McCain instead of busily massaging the meme of the unstoppable veep into a self-fulfilling prophecy. (Link to this)

McCAIN/PALIN: WRONG ON MANY LEVELS

September 5, 2008

Err...

(Link to this)

MY BIG FAT OBNOXIOUS AMERICAN CHURCH

September 5, 2008

Fried Wire moves that we institute an annual federal holiday during which every "Christian" in America has to shut their pie holes for 24 hate-free hours. Wouldn't that be nice?

Not sure if you know this, keep it to yourself if it's meant to be a secret, but American Christians totally suck. There isn't anywhere else where people who claim to follow Jesus behave like such giant dicks and exhibit such a profound hatred for almost everyone.
Pastor David Allison of the Havens Corners Church, Blacklick, Ohio, is a great example:

What kind of dick would put up a sign like this outside a church? And what kind of idiot would think it wouldn't confuse the bejeezuz out of anyone who wasn't a 14-year old girl and therefore wouldn't know the song "I Kissed a Girl"?

This picture was sent in to NBC4 in Ohio by a reader who labeled it "Worst Church Sign Ever." Good work, Pastor Allison, though I don't think you're in the same league as the c*ntish pastor that came up with this one:

(Link to this)

McAMBIEN

September 5, 2008

"I thought it was the worst speech by a nominee that I've heard since Jimmy Carter in 1980.... I personally cannot remember a single policy proposal that he made because they had nothing connecting them. I found it shockingly bad."
Jeffrey Toobin, CNN

I didn't watch much of McAmbien's speech last night. I was operating heavy machinery (my remote) and it could have been dangerous. But what I saw was predictably soporific and not a little sad. It was more like a self-delivered obit biography than a campaign speech. More like a disjointed amble down memory lane summing up the highlights of a mediocre career that's now over.

But, staggeringly, it seems McCain's speech drew more viewers than Obama's acceptance speech. WTF??? Did the Nielsen families just click on and fall asleep like those delegates from Utah and Puerto Rico?

After watching McCain's snore-a-thon, Republican pundits Peggy Noonan and Mike Murphy committed the mortal sin of honesty in a 'hot mic' incident that later had Noonan stretching for an unconvincing apology.

"Peggy Noonan, Ronald Reagan's speechwriter, pronounced: "It's over", in a conversation at the end of an interview on MSNBC. Co-panelist Mike Murphy, presidential candidate Senator John McCain’s campaign manager in 2000, said of his former boss’s pick: "It’s not going to work." Asked by the presenter Chuck Todd if Mrs Palin, who has been governor of Alaska for 18 months, was really the most qualified Republican woman, Mrs Noonan moaned: "Most qualified? No. I think they went for this, excuse me, political bullshit about narratives.""

Once the howls, squeaks and shrieks from the wingnut herd die down and the real campaigning begins, the Obama campaign should make short work of demolishing the moribund McCain/Palin ticket. Just hope there's enough non-morons left amongst us to take notice and vote accordingly. (Link to this)

THE SINGLE STUPIDEST THING EVER SAID BY ANYONE

September 4, 2008

Yes, you heard it, an epoch-making moment in television...

Just watched Rethuglican ponse Glenn Beck interview Jerome Corsi, author of "Obama Nation" (and, just for balance, David Freddoso who wrote "The Case Against Barack Obama") Here's two books I wouldn't even wipe my dog's ass with let alone my own, but sometimes watching this kind of stuff can provide unexpected rewards. Like hearing live the single most stupid thing ever said by anyone since human beings developed spoken language.

It was after what felt like several hours of claptrap about Obama's 'relationship' with Bill Ayers that the prattle devolved into this:

Beck: Because William Ayers is a guy who said, you know, rise up, kill your parents. You know, take -- turn over and burn -- burn the -- basically, burn everything down to the ground and take that from the haves for the have-nots. Do either of you guys actually believe that Obama believes this stuff?

Corsi: Absolutely.

(Transcript) (Link to this)

SARAH PALIN HITS IT OUT OF THE (TRAILER) PARK

September 4, 2008

Conservatives across America find their voice: It's shrill, sarcastic, and it belongs to George W. Bush.

Sarah Palin's speech last night is being lauded by the wingnuts. No big surprise. If the RNC had stood a chimpanzee with a Stephen Hawking voice box in front of a big flag, they'd have clapped their tiny hearts out too. But who wrote the speech? That's the interesting part:

"Matthew Scully served until August 2004 as special assistant to the president and deputy director of presidential speechwriting. He worked for President George W. Bush a total of five years, including 18 months in the 2000 campaign, and was part of the team that drafted the President’s post-September 11th addresses and every major speech of the first term."

If you're trying to argue that you're not effectively a third Bush term, it might seem an eccentric decision to hire Bush's speechwriter. But, luckily for McCain/Palin, the witless herds who'll vote for them probably have a shakier grasp on the concept of irony than even they do. (Link to this)

IF YOU CAN'T BEAT 'EM, HIRE 'EM

September 2, 2008

The McPresidentasaurus hires Bush's 2000 slimer

As if to further his tragedian descent into oblivion, McCain has just hired the "illegitimate black baby" guy who helped scupper him in 2000. Truly, bits are flying off the Straight Talk Express like an out-of-control clown car. Truly pathetic. (Link to this)

SKANKGATE, DAY TWO

September 2, 2008

Obama proves he's way too high-minded to be president by urging the scribblers to lay off Sarah Palin's parental difficulties. No such restraint here at Fried Wire... Welcome to Skankgate!

Soooo… let’s get this straight… you are the mother of a 16/17-year-old girl. Your daughter gets herself knocked up in a skankish premarital sex tryst that would be defined as statutory rape in 14 states. And, somehow, this doesn’t make you look like a bad mother? How does that work again?

I don’t give a rat’s ass about the moral or redemptive aspects of this story. Teenage pregnancies are the result of bad parenting. Period. Doesn’t matter if you’re a welfare mom (and how would those wingnuts and Jeezuz thugs be defending Palin if she was?) or governor of Alaska.

This is about neglect. Do the reasons really matter why you weren't paying attention to your child? Whether you were chasing your political career or chasing the crack pipe, the end result is the same. You f***ed up.

And Palin's massive unsuitability for the job is still raising interesting questions about the broader McCain campaign. Did McCain pick Palin partly because the rethug 'big hitters' (e.g., Huckabee, Giuliani, Romney) didn't want to risk screwing their own presidential pooches by joining McCain's ticket? In the aftermath of Skankgate, will McCain be forced to drop Palin and beg one of these bastards to climb aboard to save his electoral ass?

If McCain did pick a less crappy running mate closer to election day, it would give him a serious last minute jump on Obama by enthusing the wingnuts and 'independents' and dominating the McNews coverage. If you were to credit McCain with a fully-functioning brain, you might even wonder if this was his plan all along: try out the long shot early on to whip up interest, then boost your game with a last minute substitution when the other team is all tired out at the end.

Could this be why the results of the investigation into Palin's alleged abuses of power, due October, aren't seeming to rattle McCain much? Would a bad outcome just serve as a handy get-out clause for McCain to institute Operation Eagleton? Is a star player like Romney or Giuliani already warming up on the subs bench??? (Link to this)

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